I promised God that if I passed, I would testify. Our St. Anthony Novena group gives me a good opportunity to do that, but I feel that I can do a better job in spreading the word that I am called to do, so thought I might make a post. (Sorry for those not of the Christian faith, I'm not going to force you to read this one haha)
Preface: A lot of people ask me how am I so even-keeled about everything in life. Many assume I have received everything I have ever wanted or prayed for and that I am just tooting my own horn. This is COMPLETELY false, I have problems just like everyone else and there are some prayers that God seems to refuse to give me, but I also have so many blessings and have focused on that to stay relatively happy and not worry.
1 Peter 5:7, 9-10:
7 Leave all your worries with him, because he cares for you. 9 Be firm in your faith and resist him, because you know that other believers in all the world are going through THE SAME kind of sufferings. 10 But after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who calls you to share his eternal glory in union with Christ, will himself perfect you and give you firmness, strength, and a sure foundation.
I haven't always done the best job in helping others to realize this and also perhaps feel some of the solace I receive through my faith. Part of this is because whenever I try to be more vocal about my faith, things start to go wrong due to others' jealousy, etc.
I haven't always done the best job in helping others to realize this and also perhaps feel some of the solace I receive through my faith. Part of this is because whenever I try to be more vocal about my faith, things start to go wrong due to others' jealousy, etc.
Verse 8 of the above says: 8 Be alert, be on watch! Your enemy, the Devil, roams around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.
Many people say it's best to not share your happiness with others so that people won't be jealous/hate you, but my intention is to maybe help somebody that's down in the dumps and has nowhere to turn but to God. Don't let the devil win by making you silence your testimonies.
This is just talking about my Journey. It is different from yours, but our final destination is the same and we have to use our blessings to help others where they are deficient.
I. Birth-5 years:
I lived a pretty basic Catholic life up until this point. I was the first generation born from immigrant parents in the 80's (the best of times cue: smooth operator)
I was baptized in the Catholic faith, and was in kindergarten. I lived just like every other first generation Indian kid. Trying to hide my chicken curry odors from the white kids and trying to learn proper grammar from them/TV.
II. 5 years-8 years
About the time I was 5, a priest was sent to Houston for the Knas. My dad hadn't sang since the 70's, but it was a skill that he was always blessed with. His father passed away when he was 5 and they grew up in poverty, so it wasn't a priority for him to develop that skill. The priest noticed this in my dad and motivated him to take a more active role in the choir. So from the age of 5 that was something that my whole family became involved in. Uncles still remind me carrying the large bags and the mics around as a kid and I learned a lot about mics (it's become somewhat of a side job... holla).
This was interesting turn of events because my mom was always the one with the most faith, but involvement in the church made my dad more religious. It's just a reminder that people can become more religious with the right motivation. I hear a lot of people (girls especially) that are afraid to get involved with somebody they like in other facets because they feel that a guy is not "religious enough". I'll be honest, this is something that scares me too because I feel I am unworthy to lead someone to increase their faith, but all you have to do is lead by example.
Anyways, still at the ages of 5-8 the only thing I cared about was playing hide-and-seek after church with my friends as well as being extremely happy when the 99 cent Big Mac sales came. Which is normal for every kid I guess.
III. 8 Years:
Not many people know this story, and I am not getting into too much detail, because that is reserved for certain people ;)
So anyways, one of my dad's childhood's friends was a priest that lived like 8 hours away in a place called Texarkana. So guess where we're taking a family vacation to? Yeah...fun times.
We went there, whatever coming back the day after Thanksgiving in 1997. It's pouring rain on the way back. I decide to take a nap comfortably, so I take off my seatbelt and just chill.
Next thing I know we are spinning. All I remember thinking is I feel like I'm on a roller coaster. I didn't have a chance to think much else, but my parents were screaming since our car had skidded out of control.
In a split second, a huge hit, and we finally stopped. I smell smoke first, and then I feel my leg in so much pain, but I did not scream. My parents and sister seem to be okay, but they are shaken and I'm quiet. My parents told me to get out of the car and that's when I realized something was wrong. I couldn't move or stand. Luckily an ambulance came within minutes.
The other car that hit the driver died on the spot. Long story short, me being without my seatbelt I should have died then also. But for some reason I didn't.
IV. 8-12: Pre-Pubescent Years
I had broken my femur, and was in the hospital for a month. My school friends would come visit me, and seeing them being able to run around while I was basically chained to my hospital bed was one of the toughest things I have gone through in my life to this day. I had a LOT of time to think, and my childhood was basically over. I had to grow up quick.
This was around the time a Kna priest working in Sugar Land, my cousin, and my dad started the St. Anthony Novena on Tuesdays (open to all Christians, but it is a Catholic mass). I have somehow found a way to make it and serve even during Pharmacy school. It's crazy to see how much the group has grown since 1998, and I'm happy my dad was integral in helping to get this started (knas CAN be evangelical when they try).
So many miracles have occurred here through the Intercession of St. Anthony (we still pray to God, we are not worshipers of Saints)
Examples:
Repeat cancers cured, couples not having children for 7+ years having children (3 instances I can remember off the top of my head), many lost items found, etc.
Elementary and on into middle school life continued to be about the same. But I could notice that I was different from my friends. The things that mattered to them were very different from what mattered to me. I kept being pulled closer and closer to church, while my friends at the time were finding ways to get away from it. Going to church twice a week, and working my schedule around Tuesday and Sunday was normal for me, and I found myself not partaking in the same activities as my friends because of it.
At the time I attributed it to me being more inclined to listen to my parents or that my parents were more strict than others, but there was a reason I was pulled towards the church more.
V. 13-18: Puberty
Middle School and into High school I continued to just feel different from others. I was pretty serious at church because I had a lot of responsibilities (mics, altar serving, singing) so that distanced me even more from my peers and friends.
About 10th grade is when I started making some friends whose values aligned more with mine than the friends I used to have. Those guys are still my good friends today, we're not the most popular, nor are we completely the same, but we are who we are haha.
VI. 18-21: College
It was in college where I started to associate with other types of Christians and was able to learn more about why I love my faith, but also how to take the positives of theirs in expanding my own faith.
I wasn't much of a party person, but I did my fair share. I commuted to school, and that kept me grounded for the most part although I could go out late. It just never became something I cared to do, and I kept my schedule revolved around Sunday/Tuesday and my free time was any days other than that.
My Faith grew by associating with other Christians and even learning more about Islam (they're more similar to us than you give them credit for). Taking Organic Chems, PCAT, getting into Pharmacy school, etc. kept me always needing God's help so I did not have a chance to stray during these years.
You're probably asking why I didn't become a priest. Well, it's something I was scared of (because nobody grows up wanting to become a priest unless they are truly called)
But still, I left it up to God, I said if I don't get into Pharmacy school and I am supposed to become a priest, just show me the way.
The 2 priests I mentioned also have a very special place in my heart and they never pressured/forced me to become a priest, so if that's what is holding you back from serving and being close to the church/priest don't let that be the reason. Priests and nuns need your love. They have left their families and are here to serve you, and usually after a few years get moved to a different church. It's hard for them to have to move on, so be their friend while they are at your church.
VII. 21-25: Pharmacy School
After I got in is when I realized the battle had just started.
The first year was rough. There were many exams where I honestly did not know what was going on and relied completely on God. He pulled me through and I was able to finish my degree on time without failing any courses.
Touching back on St. Anthony Novena somehow even if I had an exam on a Wednesday, without much studying or cramming on Tuesday, God would show me through and help me. He would not give me an excuse to drift away from there. I don't do any of it for praise and get mad when my cousin tries to celebrate things like my graduation publicly.
I do it:
1. to hear people testify their blessings
2. to help create (it takes a lot of people's hard work to conduct this) an environment where people who make time during the week to praise God
3. to give people a place to go that extra mile in prayer for something that they really need
4. to sing and hear others singing (the white people singing the Malayalam songs is the best) because nobody there is ashamed to proclaim their faith.
5. (I don't condone skipping church on Sunday) but some people have told me that Sunday mass doesn't spiritually reach them, but they are thankful to have Tuesday Novena and mass to fill their void (English mass with Malayalam songs so we reach a wide variety of people).
I feel thankful to have had the events in my life lead me on this path so bluntly. The events have made my life bumpy, but I wouldn't change it for the world.
My points in this post:
1. Please spread goodness (in my case it stemmed from my faith) it doesn't have to be in the form of spreading Christianity or any faith. Just do good for others especially with all the blessings we have.
2. Find a charity to donate to (I honestly hate giving back to charities in the US because there always seems to be some level of corruption. I have two places I periodically send money to: St Anthony orphanage for kids in Alapuzha, and an elderly home for adult orphans without children or abandoned by their children. If you would like to donate to them too, holla! But feel free to find your way to give back
3. Find a way to have a bigger role in your church: serve, help younger kids, clean, anything. There's always a way.
4. You have so much more than you think. Avoid being jealous of others because they have problems just like you do. You can't pick and choose one aspect of their life that you would like.
For example I'll be honest: I am jealous of the level of fitness some guys have, but I would never trade that for my faith, my parents/sister just to name a few things.
5. Don't be afraid to lead others or to be led towards increased faith. It might turn people against you mainly in the form of jealousy, but that's letting the devil win.
This post is to show how God has supported me in my lowest to bring me to this point. He can do the very same for you if you submit your faith to him.
Random Tidbit: Am I the only one that hates the emergence of these things?
Aite I'm done
