"I'm Following all your tips, but girls are still not throwing themselves at me...."

Sup guys, hope everyone enjoyed their summer (while I did not have one).




But, I'm not complaining because life could always be worse, and atleast the Rockets have Dwight Howard.

It's getting really hot in Houston, and I'm getting lazier about everything. I need somebody to hose me down with cold water just to stay hydrated 

 I have neglected the blog for a while, forgive me. 

So......I've noticed people only admit to reading and enjoying my blog when they are drunk. 

Heh

I was surprised after my last post, I did not receive threatening comments from girls. I guess that means either girls believe in my fashion advice,

OR girls just don't read my blog

(WHO ARE WE KIDDING WE KNOW IT AIN'T THIS)

Once again "DISCLAIMER: THESE ARE MAINLY MY OPINIONS, YOU ARE STILL BEAUTIFUL, GIRRRRLLL"

I ACTUALLY FORGOT TWO COMMENTS regarding FASHION....

1. Headbands

Type A: I get it, you're a hipster....

and then.............

Type B: I get it, you're.....the queen of Egypt?

NO


NO, just....don't

2.Midriff showing dresses/ short top and placing skirt at a distance (i don't even know sometimes if it's one dress or ur just pulling ur skirt down to show some midriff.

whatever the hell this is or something like it:

IS THIS THE BEGINNING OF FEMALE SAGGING?

Okay, I get it if you have abs and a belly button piercing or something, but some girls got it just up above their breasts. I'm just not a big fan

These are the only midriff revealing dresses that should be worn, just look at these hunnies:

ANYWAYS before I get killed

As usual I like to address the concerns of the critics of my blog

 (I appreciate the love though, I'm here for you)

"Groominguru, what do you know about picking up girls?"

I guess you're right, only aunties love me. 

BUT I have watched a lot of movies and done a lot of research. 

With that being said....

"GROOMINGURU, I'M FOLLOWING ALL YOUR ADVICE BUT I'M STILL NOT PICKING UP GUYS/GIRLS"

Mainly, you want them to look at you like :

But all you're getting is: 

Then there are the critics that are like "uhh groominguru i be gettin guys/girls by doin the EXACT OPPOSITE of your advice.....and to that I say:

(except I'm being 17 times more sarcastic)

My Response (in list form for you to better follow).

1. I did not promise that you would pick up guys/girls. 

In our society, we are so used to having things handed to you 

That is not happening here, get yourself out there.

2. I'm a stern believer in:

look good =feel good= do good

Sometimes, you just gotta have confidence. If you are properly groomed, you got one less thing to worry about.

3. Timing/Preparation

You must always be prepared. God has a schedule for everything, just be ready to make a move (with your properly groomed/dressed self when homegirl look at you like: 

Ending Tidbits:

August 15th: The Assumption of Mary and Indian Independence Day.

As a Catholic, we are misperceived as worshipping Saints/Mary.

We all just need a little bit of help, so we pray for intercession.

INDIA

I'm proud of my country and their hardworking ways, these kids in poverty will become a success with their driven mentality.