Time flies.....1 year anniversary: Who is the groominguru and how did he get here?

Hey guys, this post is kinda special since it's the one year anniversary. It's been a wild ride eh? It's been a pleasure to make some laugh, give guidance to others, and piss off the rest. 

(I love this fool haha)

I decided to change it up a little and take a look at how I became the groominguru. 

(Faces of others blotted out for confidentiality, etc.)

I. Genetics/Parents

Believe it or not, I'm not even the biggest critic of fashion/grooming in my household. That position goes to....

my mom. 

But i will randomly get her approval on my clothes/hair 

She's nitpicked my fashion choices/hair cuts/beards/eye brows for all these years and for that...

She was rockin the juba tops before it became popular (picture circa '82)

Let's not forget my dad, he moved to Bombay at the age of 17 and brought fashion to his peoples in the South. 

Watch ✔          Belt Buckle ✔         Tie /Tight knot ✔          Hair ✔        Bad Ass 'Stache ✔

II. Birth, the beginning....

 

Started out chinese with sparse hair/eyebrows

Then....BAM

So I was born and grew up in the hood of Houston (Sharpstown, holla) It was a very...urban environment and it was only a matter of time until we got shot up.

Long story short, our cadillac got stolen and we had no other choice but to get up outta there and move on up to the suburbs. 

III. Suburb Life/Fat

It started out like any other 1st generation Indian kid. I had to mix MY culture

With that of the white man

(wassup on that L.A. Gear kicks though?)

What made me so critical of fashion/grooming? I had alot of female influences in my life. Along with my mom, and my neighbor chechys that babysat me......I had 11 (ELEVEN) female first cousins.

(Yes those are all girls, and I'm the only guy...so you can see that I had to listen to girl talk all day)

Anyways, life in the suburbs was different. I wasn't running for my life from goons and I was drinking alot of Whole milk. Needless to say, I started one of my gluttony phases. 

I got fatter.....

And fatter.....

And even fatter... 

I was starting to look like our (former) boy....Screw you Parsons!

Needless to say, I wasn't into fashion because All I could fit into was HUSKY

IV. Mayonnaise and Salt

Age 13

If you've read my previous posts, you might remember that I started shaving in the 7th grade. This led to the "Mayonnaise and Salt" Phenomenon.

I guess i was always a BS'er. I had grown facial hair so early, my peers wanted to know my secret as to how I grew it. So one random day on AIM I started telling my friends I smothered my face with mayonnaise and salt to grow hair. I'm not sure where I got this from, but it just seemed like a potent hair growing formula.

Needless to say some friends and classmates tried this...to no avail (sorry if I made you break out).

This was probably when I first started being consulted on grooming. 

V. Weight Loss/Beard precision. 

It was during my first year of college after the first semester ('circa 2009) that I decided I wanted to lose weight. I cut out alot of fatty foods/drinks that were detrimental to my life and weight. I pulled a "Schmidt" from New Girl...

And evolved into a precise goatee producing machine

and even experimented 

(one whole side of this beard is eyeliner...can you guess which side?)

But I wasn't Done...

I started to grow out my beard

And eventually molded it into what it is today.

What was my motivation? Health, People calling me fat, and to be able to fit into normal sized clothes. 

VI. Groominguru/Douchebag Perception

And now, here we are. Most people know I'm joking almost all the time. Others think I'm condescending/high maintenance.

I'm just saying what other people are thinking, while spreading some knowledge I have gained through practice. 

I only shave once for the weekend, the rest of the time I'm bummin....

There's a fine line between being cocky and confident. Be confident and be all that you can be. 

I'm really not a douchebag 

You can take the boy outta the ghetto, but you can't take the ghetto outta the boy...

(If you're my friend on snapchat, you know I send stuff like this for fun)

I guess I'm just a hipster.

                                   

VII. "Can you teach my boyfriend how to shave like you?"

Usually I say no because even though I'm not attracted to these girls that are "commited" to their said boyfriend who doesn't even know how to shave (get yourself an upgrade girl ;) ) ...I just refuse to be friend-zoned.

THAT BEING SAID...alot of my guy friends have also wanted video of how to shave...so as a gift for being loyal fans for the past year, and this being my last post I leave you guys with this gift...

VIII. Peace Out

If you've taken nothing away from my posts I leave you with 3 pearls:

A. I hope I leave you with the desire to put yourself in the best position to succeed (Look good, feel good, do good).

B. Enjoy the path that life takes you on. Take the blows and make the most of every situation. Don't be afraid to try new things.

C. Pray hard, pray often (even if things are going well), and pray with conviction. If you don't believe in prayer just "put your mind to" specific goals until you attain them. Know what you want and don't settle for anything less. 

                                                            It's been a helluva ride guys

But I bid my fans, foes, and everyone in between farewell.